Tuesday, June 16, 2009

One man's cold is another man's hot

I just want to say good-bye to anyone who is used to seeing me out and about.

It's that time of the year again when I know my summer hibernation is about to begin. In central to northern North America people head indoors somewhere around late October, only to surface again the following spring. In Toronto that can arrive anywhere from mid April to late June.

However, in Israel, I find myself doing the exact opposite. It's around this time of the year that I start finding it a task to even have skin. It's just too hot to wear anything and if I could peel off my skin, I probably would.

I was looking in my closet yesterday and I realized that I no longer own any real winter clothes. I have a few sweaters, but they don't really constitute winter sweaters by Canadian standards. They are all lightweight, early fall wear if you ask a Canadian. Also, I have a ridiculous number of flip flops and sandals. Please don't repeat this to Chaim because it would just reinforce his thinking, but the truth is that if you wear summer shoes six months of the year, you need lots of them. And I wear summer shoes six months of the year.

I am indignant when that inevitable point comes, sometime in late December, when I realize that I am going to have to find my tights and put them on. I complain all winter that I am freezing, when in fact, I am only wearing a light sweater and a jean jacket -- and those stupid tights. People inevitably say: "You're Canadian, this must be a breeze for you." Well, let me tell you something. I haven't experienced a Canadian winter in seven years and I have long since forgotten what they are like. Nor do I care to remember. And I am definitely not one of those people who scoot off to Jerusalem if they have any snowfall. It's a thrill I can easily live without.

Somewhere around February I start wishing for summer. You think I would learn. But I don't.

Come June, summer is back in full force and I can't remember why I wanted it to return so badly. There is nothing worse than getting dressed in the morning and then -- within taking 10 steps outside -- being so hot that your clothes are sticking to you and you start to smell less than rose like.

You hop into your car in search of a reprieve but the car is so hot that you could fry an egg on it. Ten minutes later the air conditioning kicks in and then you are so cold that you can pretty much expect to be sick within a few days of this routine.

Finally there is summer vacation and the kids want to go somewhere -- anywhere. You want to stay indoors until November but they have other ideas. I refuse to go the beach until the sun is setting -- and since we live 15 minutes from the beach I can impose that rule. However, my kids are not deterred. They want to climb a mountain or go on a three-hour hike. I fight. I complain. I divert. And then I get in the hot car and go. But as soon as I can, I come home and go back to the basement, where I will happily stay until the Israeli winter sets in and it is safe to come out again.

2 comments:

  1. Nice post. Good to see you have enabled comments. This is where your fans should comment, not in a 'reply all' email.

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  2. I still can't figure out why it wasn't there to begin with but thanks for your guidance ... it's here now and that should solve some of the problems

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