I was reading one of the Israeli newspapers yesterday and I noticed an advertisement offering to help men get over their homosexuality. Needless to say, it caught my attention and I just had to click on the ad and see precisely how they were going to do that. I am a firm believer that being gay is not a choice but rather a genetic predisposition. I am even willing to consider that some people have traumatic life experiences that result in them rejecting the "other" sex.
That said, I do not for one minute think that people get out of bed one day and decide to be gay. With all the stigmas against it in our society, why would anyone make that choice? The fact that I can't easily answer that question suggests to me, that I am on to something.
Now Jewish religious scholars discuss homosexuality in terms of free choice. That man was given free choice is what sets him apart from other life forms. And from that, these scholars take the leap that people choose to be gay -- it's a choice that they make. That's where they lose me. Do they also choose to be alcoholics and psychopaths? Somehow I doubt it.
But since it states in the Torah that homosexuality is wrong, then there is inevitably going to be someone out there who is going to try to help those who cannot help themselves. Jonah, Jews Offering New Alternatives to Homosexuality, is such an organization.
Here's what they are offering: "to educate the world-wide Jewish community about the prevention, intervention, and healing of the underlying issues causing same-sex attraction." Is anyone else suspicious about this? Frankly I would think that going to one of their group therapy sessions was just an opportunity to meet other like-minded people.
According to Jonah, everyone has the ability to change ..... their sexual orientation.
If that was the case why have so many men chosen suicide or depression, or to live "in the closet" rather than going through a therapy treatment to '"change"? Do you think that most of them would choose this lifestyle? Who, of their own free will, chooses something contrary to the doings of the general public?
It's also interesting to note that while academics studying the roots of homosexuality are not clear on what makes one person a homosexual and not his or her sibling, Jonah has the whole thing figured out. There may be biologicial roots, say the academics, and there may be social roots, but at the end of the day, still very little is known about what causes some people to be attracted to the same sex. With all due respect to the Torah, I am sticking with the scientists and researchers on this.
I remember hearing a rabbi in Toronto who once spoke on this matter and said that overcoming sexual persuasion was the same as deciding to lose weight. It was simply mind over matter. And then I remembered another story that took place in Israel sometime in the last ten plus years.
A nice religious girl was set up to marry a nice religious boy who was studying with her father, who was a religious bigwig in Jerusalem. There is no sexual tension leading up to the wedding because the boy dutifully keeps his distance and studied a lot with the other guys in his yeshiva. They got married but the nice boy never gets around to consummating the marriage because -- as it soon becomes apparent -- he is gay!
The entire religious community of Jerusalem is shocked. The question is if all of this is just a matter of social re-engineering, why didn't someone take this young gay fellow aside and straighten him out? Heaven knows, as the result of marrying such a well-connected young woman, he had every such opportunity available to him. Maybe the answer is that it's ridiculous and it just doesn't work. And maybe Torah scholars should stick to Torah and let scientists and science researchers do their jobs.
Great post
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