I really wish Ari could drive

The other day I had more things to do than I had time to do them. I am sure you all have lots of moments like that. The worst part was that my 13-year-old son, Ari, was home, wandering around, whistling Dixie without a care in the world.

In all fairness, he asked me if he could help out. I said: "sure, go get your drivers' license and then I have a zillion things you could do for me." With that, I stomped out the door to go pick up one of my other kids from yet another after school program. If I thought for one second that the kids learned anything of value in school, I would drop at least half the after school programs. But alas, they are still in way too many programs.

Later, when I was calmer, I was thinking about how normal parents probably want to keep their kids out from behind the wheel of a death-enabling machine for as long as possible. What, then, was wrong with me????

Now I have had time to think it through and I have come to the realization that parents want it both ways. We want our kids to stay young, safe and at home where we can control most situations. On the other hand, we want them to be independent and go out and conquer the world -- which cancels out all the things on the previous list.

This whole contradiction is further exacerbated in Israel. We all know when we move here that eventually the army will come calling. The day your child turns 16 they mail you their first "welcome, we know who you are and where you live" letter. From what I have heard from my friends, it is a pivotal moment in every parent's life. I'm not sure what the kids think but the parents recognize it for what it is ... the inevitable approach of the end of childhood.

And then, as if you didn't get the point, they send you regular reminders over the next few years to tell you that they haven't forgotten about your child. Very Orwellian if you ask me.

Which brings me back to driving. Now that I have thought it through more completely I have decided to continue complaining and doing carpool. I intend to keep my son as close to home as I possibly can over the next few years -- knowing full well that he will be pulling away as much as he can. However, I have also decided that he should learn to drive before he learns to shoot an M-16. And then I am going to pray that he drives well and never has to shoot that gun.