If you are half iron man, what is the other half?

My husband Chaim's ego decided that he should compete in the upcoming Half Ironman competition in Eilat. And apparently the rest of his mind and body just went along for the bike ride, swim and run.

I mean, let's face it, he wasn't born yesterday. Not even close to yesterday. I can't tell you how old he is because I am under strict instructions to answer all inquiries of that nature with the following statement: (Yes, I have been married to him for almost two decades but...) "I don't know". I know that sounds ridiculous but that is the official stance and I just tell people it never came up in conversation!

So, back to the Half Ironman. This competition involves an almost two kilometer swim in the sea, a 90 km bike ride up and down some apparently pretty nasty mountains, and a 21 km run. In total this should take the average non-professional athlete about seven hours.

My first question is why would anyone want to do such a horrific thing to themselves? Truth is I am totally adverse to exercise so I am probably not the best person to take a stab at answering that question. I think the answer is sort of the Himalayin standard: "Because it is there." Well so are crocodiles and I never feel the urge to swim with them.

And my second question is if you are only striving to be half an Ironman, what do you want for your other half? I am not even going to try to answer that. I would probably pick a second half of cotton candy or something light and easy like that. I think your other half must be 100% crazy, but as I mentioned, I consider carrying the groceries from the car to the house as weight lifting.

So we are off to Eilat first thing Thursday morning. We have to get there with enough time for Chaim to completely psyche himself out. Apparently he isn't freaked out quite enough yet. I thought today's test swim in the Mediterranean Sea might be enough to deter him. The water was rough and well, it is February, so even though we live in the Middle East, it isn't exactly balmy here. But no, despite the truly unpleasant experience he reported, he has decided to go ahead with his crazy plan. And we, his family, are all being dragged along to watch him.

At least we have matching bright yellow "Go Daddy" T-shirts.

That should make it easier for the ambulance to pick us out of the crowd when it comes time to take him to the hospital and the attendants need family consent.